Thursday, September 30, 2010

amazing love

I love it when God slowly reveals something to me. It started at the Well. I started asking myself the question.. what do I do with my days? Am I living each day simply loving God and making appropriate decisions? Or am I using my days to further His Kingdom. To be a light. The questions captured my thoughts the rest of the night. Then tonight at Unashamed, the Lord showed me again how much He needed His children to GO and be his hands and feet. All through scripture we know that we are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus and to help the hurt and lonely. In Matthew he says that whatever we did for the least of these we did for Him. Sidenote- I began reading Matthew and kind of wondered why I was. I thought, this is kind of cliche to start with the first book of the New Testament. But God had such a plan in it. It has been the biggest blessing.. it's so great to see God work through something that seems so simple. Anyways, while the past couple of weeks God has been really working on my heart to have full dependence on Him, He's also beginning to show me that my walk with Him isn't all about myself. It's about the ones who still need to be saved by His grace that I am called to reach. So while the Lord wants me drawing near to Him, we are also called to make disciples of the nations. My prayer is that the Lord will give me boldness and strength and courage to stand for Him and reach the lost and broken in our desperate generation.

I know in my head or during a service, my role in this life seems so clear. To serve and live for Jesus. And everything in me desires it. But how easy is it to act out of our flesh and live for this world.. very. So I'll claim it everyday.. I'm sinful and mess up all the time. But what my heart ultimately longs for is Jesus. Because He is the only true and perfect thing. And He loves me through my wretchedness. Hallelujah.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010


I love coming home. It's my mama's birthday so I drove back to Vestavia for the night!! Birthday dinner and One Tree Hill.. goodness. But what is even better... is God. God is good. He's everything. Amazing. Everywhere. A Comforter. Protector. Guider. Healer. All Powerful. Worthy. Loving. GOOD. He is good and enough for me. I'm excited we don't have a swap this Thursday because I get to go to Unashamed which I've been looking forward to for.. forever. So, call me/text me/facebook me/skype me.. whatever. And let me know if you would like to join! I know it will be amazing and the Lord never fails to show his glory and love. Hallelujah He is good!

Monday, September 27, 2010

ihb day

Let me introduce you to "ihb day".. also known as I hate boys day.
Kristen and I try to celebrate it every Friday.
So, this Friday is ihb day number two. Feel free to join us.
It's pretty amazing.
Ice cream, successful shopping day.. the works.

good morning

It is currently 6 a.m. Why am I awake? Well, I was super tired last night so I ended up going to bed at 9 so I have already gotten 9 hours of sleep and I am wide awake. Unfortunately, I am starting to get sick and I  woke up with a sore throat. Problem. No orange juice.

So this weekend.. I left for fall retreat Friday. And of course the Lord showed up. I had to leave early so I only heard two of the messages but of course they were on two areas that I needed to hear about the most. A "God thing". He's always looking out for us. He knew that I was only going to be on the retreat for a little while, so He blessed my time there. We left Saturday afternoon and headed back to Tuscaloosa for pledge formal. Which ended up being a ton of fun but left me super tired Sunday. My mom, dad, and Sarah came up to go to church and lunch with Austin and I for my mama's birthday. I may go home for her actual birthday Tuesday too. Okay it's still early and I think I'm rambling.

Rise and shine.. the sun isn't even up yet! Have a blessed day and week!
Psalm 145

Friday, September 24, 2010

weekend wonders

 Friday, Friday, Friday!! I'm leaving for Campus Crusades fall retreat in a little bit! I'm so excited! I have no idea what to expect, but I know getting away to be with the Lord and learn about Him is always a blessing. Pledge formal is tomorrow night so some of us will be leaving early for that, but I know that the time I am on retreat will be so wonderful and I can't wait to see how the Lord shows up. I'm so sad because Ronnie Freeman will be in Vestavia Sunday night and I can't go because we have new member meeting.. boo. But hopefully I will be hearing him every night next summer at the Ranch?! Let's see.. that's all I know about my weekend right now! Maybe lunch Sunday for my Mama's birthday and of course Sunday study hall! Have a blessed weekend!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010


I was listening to the song "Embracing Accusations" by Shane and Shane. A little confused by the lyrics I googled it, of course, and found this on a website. You should listen to the song too.. probably after reading this:

The song is called “Embracing Accusations” and at first glance, even if you know Shane Barnard, you begin to wonder if his theology has just gone totally off the deep end. It seems to be essentially a song praising the devil, for he is right.
Shane says he was running on the beach one evening before a show and was meditating on Galatians 3:10:
All who rely on observing the law are under a curse, for it is written “cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law.”
He said he was overwhelmed with guilt at this truth from Satan…that because he does not follow everything written in the Book of the Law, he is cursed. Satan was trying to tear apart Shane’s faith but instead, ended up preaching the gospel to him. Yes, he is cursed BUT Christ paid that death for us, so he is cursed no longer. For this passage from Galatians doesn’t end there, it goes onto to say in Galatians 3:13:
Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written “cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.”


The Lord has been teaching me the last couple of days. James 4:8 says "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." So that's what I've been doing. Let's start with Monday night. Alpha Gam is doing a freshman bible study, and I've been so blessed by it. We are going through the book of Romans, and this past Monday we talked about Romans 2. I was immediately convicted as we read the first verse: "You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgement on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgement do the same things." How many times do I catch myself judging others for things I do too. I'm a sinner too so who am I to judge others? The Lord is showing me the root of this is my own self-centeredness. My prayer the last few days is that He would humble me.

Last night at Crusades, He revealed my selfishness again. The sole purpose of my faith should be my relationship with Christ. I shouldn't want what He can give me and I shouldn't be trying to do "good Christian things". I should solely want HIM. As a selfish human, I must die daily to my flesh and this world in order to live a humble life for the Lord. I'm so thankful that He daily reveals Himself to me and reveals these truths that will deepen my faith and journey with Him.

I haven't been able to update this because I've been studying for Geography. And at first I was like "ugh geography who do I even have to know this." But last night as I was cramming, the Lord softened my heart and showed me how amazing He was. As I studied, I realized how intricately our world was made. I was amazed as I thought, 'He did this for us.' It reminds me of JH when our accountability group talked about seeing eternity in everything. The Lord revealed to me his goodness through a Geography book; He's everywhere. 

I'm so imperfect and in need of His love and grace each day. I depend on myself when I should be fully dependent on Him in every area of my life. But He is good and His plans are perfect. He's an excerpt from the book I'm reading by Joshua Harris:

C.S. Lewis once wrote a friend: "I don't doubt that the Holy Spirit guides your decisions from within when you make them with the intention of pleasing God. The error would be to think that He speaks only within, whereas in reality He speaks also through Scripture, the Church, Christian friends, books, etc." Though God speaks to Christians primarily through His Word, He confirms and leads us in many different ways. But we should resist over-spiritualizing the steps He expects us to take to more choices.
God knows all things. He knows whom we'll marry before we meet him or her. But that doesn't mean our task is to discover what He already knows or to worry that we might miss His perfect plan. Our responsibility is to love Him, study his Word, deepen our relationship with Him, and learn to evaluate our choices in light of biblical wisdom. If we're doing these things, we can make our decisions in the confidence that we aren't somehow missing God's will.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

He is good

Back in Tuscaloosa. It's been quite a day! I got to work in the nursery at church today for the first time in months! I've missed it so much. We had seven babies and they are just the sweetest ever. One of the girls, Layla, was so precious. The Lord reminded me of the child-like faith He calls us to have. I get so caught up in thinking and wondering when all He calls us to do is step out in faith and trust Him. Sounds easy right? But we make it so difficult.

The past hour I've been reading this book called "Boy Meets Girl.. say hello to courtship". Sounds crazy I know. Courtship? But it really is such a cool book all about God's intentions for relationships. I've never really been a reader but tonight I'm all for it. I started by rereading through my journal from JH. It's so amazing to see what all God did while I was at the ranch. From my May entries til now I'm in awe of Him and how he has blessed me and my faith. Then I started reading the "Boy Meets Girl" book (which I bought who knows how long ago and am just now getting around to reading it). And now I'm about to start rereading "Redeeming Love". I finished it a couple of weeks ago but I am just so in love with it I'm reading it again. I hope the Lord has someone like Michael Hosea for me. If you haven't read it, read it. I promise you will love it.

The Lord is working in me and I am in awe. He's breaking down walls and teaching me. Teaching me patience and dependence on Him. He is so good. And I'm so undeserving.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

In the Blink of an Eye

First, roll tide!! Except I'm the kind of person who feels bad for the team losing so I was semi rooting for Duke to score a couple of points. Typically I'd call today boring but I've loved just relaxing at home. I went for a run today (I know, it's a miracle) and I had my music on shuffle and the song "In the Blink of an Eye" by MercyMe came on. It's a pretty old song but I listened to the words while I was running and it's so amazing. I really think the Lord speaks to me through songs. Unfortunately they don't have an official music video for the song and let's face it the lyric/picture ones posted on youtube didn't do the song justice. But here are the lyrics. I hope you're challenged and blessed by them..

You put me here for a reason
You have a mission for me
You knew my name and You called it
Long before I learned to breathe

Sometimes I feel disappointed
By the way I spend my time
How can I further Your kingdom
When I'm so wrapped up in mine

In a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given
There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

And though I'm living a good life
Can my life be something great?
I have to answer the question
Before it's too late

Cause in a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given
There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye

If I give the very best of me
That becomes my legacy
So tell me what am I waiting for?
What am I waiting for?

In a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given

In a Blink of an eye that is when
I'll be closer to You than I've ever been
Time will fly, but until then
I'll embrace every moment I'm given
There's a reason I'm alive for a blink of an eye 

"The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever." 1 John 2:17

Friday, September 17, 2010

home sweet home

So, it's Friday and I'm back in Vestavia. Thank goodness. It's only my second time home and it feels good to be back. Except I have to study for Geography all weekend. A little tired from last night.. 

It's fun being home. Diet Cokes and Fuzes, Dove chocolate and goldfish, puzzles, One Tree Hill. The norm in the Duckworth house. Home sweet home. I'm going to see Fame tonight with the Escue's and my mama. I've heard it's so good so I'm excited!! Okay, I better get off the computer. It's wayy too addicting. Have a blessed day(:

Thursday, September 16, 2010


Well, it's been an eventful 24 hours. 

Last night after dinner at Mugshots with about 17 Alpha Gams, some of us went to Walmart to buy a button up and boxers for the swap tonight. It's pimps and hoes.. needless to say I'm being a shacker because I can't rock the hoe attire. 

After the Walmart run, I got a parking ticket outside the Alpha Gam house.. oops. Then being all responsible-like I went to pay it today but it's not on my bill yet because it had only been about 10 hours. So much for my responsibility!
I experienced my first 8 a.m. class today to take my math test.. I will never take an 8 a.m. class. I think I slept walk to tut this morning. I really don't know how I did that everyday in high school!

This afternoon was wonderful. I get to mentor a precious 5th grader at Holt Elementary. He's getting his subtraction and decimals DOWN. Hip Hip.. It really is so fun to help him learn. Oh, and he reads to me. Good thing I'm an Elementary Education major!

My prayer for the day was to see the Lord in everything. Because life is busy busy and sometimes I'm gonna get a parking ticket, but that doesn't mean He's not working through it all. The Lord is faithful.. a provider and comforter. 

"If You Want Me To" by Ginny Owens

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Francis Chan - Balance Beam


so study hall today was semi productive until the last ten minutes... 

the procrastination continues.. One Tree Hill premiered tonight so of course I'm watching it instead of cleaning my room or doing homework or something productive. Campus Crusades is in 30 minutes and I love going there. So, song of the day: "Whatever you're doing" by Sanctus Real:

It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
All I can do is surrender

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something heavenly

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Revaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow your will
or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is you want from me
I give everything I surrender...


Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to to release all my held back tears

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but now I can see
This something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly
Something heavenly

It's time to face up
Clean this old house
Time breathe in and let everything out

I love the chorus. Because even though life can seem so crazy sometimes and I wonder what in the world the Lord is doing, there's a peace because I know He's up to something "bigger than me". Anyways, this song was in my head all day. And it was such an encouragement!!

Monday, September 13, 2010

a new start

College has begun and it's crazy hectic. Everything is happening so quickly and I don't want to get carried away. I want to try to daily glorify what the Lord is doing in my life and highlight those experiences, since so much of my time is spent in class, studying, and at parties..

I guess I should start with this.. the night before we left for college I was listening to 93.7 driving to Mallory's house to say goodbyes to everyone. The man on the radio was referencing Matthew 7:7 "Ask and it will given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." He went on to say how all the times he'd read the verse he'd always seen it as a verse referring to salvation. However, the Lord showed him how in everything he did to ask the Lord. So I turned off the radio and thought about how many times i thought about wanting to make amazing friends in college and stay close to my friends in high school and everything like that. However, I was convicted because I was too foolish to ask the Lord. So right then in the car I asked the Lord to watch over me and give me the friends I needed to help me endure the craziness of college. And of course He was faithful. The past month of school has been amazing. I've met the most wonderful girls ever and I couldn't be happier. Once again, He has shown me how faithful He really is.

With the ups and downs of life and my faith, I found myself this morning seeking the Lord to reveal his faithfulness once more. Who knew it would only take a few hours. Reading through Matthew, I was reminded of the verse Matthew 7:7 and my experience the night before I left for college. I turned to Proverbs and read chapter 16. Proverbs 16:3, 9 "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed... In his heart a man plans his course but the Lord determines his steps" both stood out to me . A couple hours later I began writing a letter... guess which verses were the best fit for that letter? Of course.. the Lord had already given me the verses and words to say for encouragement in this letter. He is consistently faithful to me. But if I'm not seeking Him, I may miss a blessing.

So even though college for many people is about how hard they can party and how many classes they can miss yet still pass.. for me I want to grow deeper with the Lord. I want to take my faith from inside my head and from my morning bible studies and show it. Do something. Make it visible. Because the Lord is too good to me for me to sit back and just enjoy Him and not share Him.